and it’s not quite exactly
like shopping or anything,
but it’s so close it sours
the mood.

I walk into town
on these various saturdays
and loiter by jewellers
like a kid on a weekend,
eyeing pedestrians
for someone who might
buy him beer.

taking in prices
and adverts, looking at shapes
of the stones, at the colours
of the wedding bands. no – this
is important, damn it! it shouldn’t be
anything like shopping – no! I want love
to spring like puppies
from the box in a movie on christmas –

not grab her with sheer
petty bribery! she should try it on, finally
and it should be perfect! we should just
fall together, lives ended,